Tag Archives: harsh truth

Planner Versus Going by my gut

#4 Do you read reviews, or just go with your gut?

https://rebekah1213.wordpress.com/2018/08/12/new-personal-prompts/

90% of the time, I am a planner.

I spend hours into . . .

  • research
  • schedules
  • organized with outlines
  • to-do lists,
  • Colored notes
  • plans from A to ZZZ.
  • I usually have at least have three different plans at one time.

Todays to-do list

  1. Write blogs
  2. Sleep
  3. Vaccum
  4. Make dinner
  5. Take out trash
  6. Work on writing notes
  7. Review fantasy football team
  • I like to get notebooks, colored pens, and day planners.
  • I like my notes in colors.
  • I even try to make a menu before I go to the store with a grocery list. I don’t have a lot of money to buy impulsively.
  • The thing that drives me crazy is my health issues that interfere with my plans.
  • I write in https://www.NaNoWriMo.org which is in November and I write 50,000 words in 30 days. I post about my research, outlining and progress on my writing blog. http://rebekahquinne.wordpress.com/
  • I do not like to be late. I pride myself to get early to appointment.
  • I get panic attacks and anxiety when I can’t schedule ahead with most things or if I’m late.

The last time I did something without research was I dated this negative guy who just didn’t want to be alone. (I wasn’t what he wanted, and he wasn’t what I wanted or needed.)

I also got a tablet with out comparing or researching the others, I should at least asked the store clerk, because it locks up on me, and will not run some of the games I want. . . Sigh.

My ex boyfriend was good at going with the flow and I knew if I was with him and his luck things would work out right. However since he died, I feel anxious without plan.

14 Day Challenge Day 12: Short Story: Beach

Day 12 Write a short story. Beach

Rebekah Wolveire © 2015

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She walked on the beach to get away from her stressful life. She allowed the waves to take away all of her problems even if it was just for those few moments. She thought she what looked like the water rushing over a huge pile of sand, but as she walked closer. . . as she walked closer, she noticed more details and saw it was a man sleeping in the sand. She rushed over and the first thing she noticed about him was his eyes. The bright blue irises reminded her of the water blending into the sky at the horizon took her breath away.

“Hi.” She could barely get the word out, while she let her hand out to help him up.

“Hi. Do you know me?” He was hesitant to grab her hand.

“You look familiar. I thought you needed help.” She sighed.

“Just be careful, not all people are so nice.” She helped him up.

“I’m Jesse.” She felt she could trust him. She felt she could tell him anything, and he would just keep her secret in the sea of blue deep in his eyes.

“I’m Jonathan.” He smiled, and she got nervous, but in an exiting way. They walked along the beach for hours. They talked openly. They laughed carelessly. They played tag like kids. Their feet running in the damp sand. They forgot life for a while. They needed each other even if it was just for that one moment.

Then in one moment of frozen time, their lips connected. The world could ended, but neither one would have cared, they had the complete intimate connection. Then the sublime day stopped sudden once he said. . .

“Damn, I need to go home,” he frowned.

“Where do you live? I’ll walk you home.” She offered not wanting to go back to her own life yet, and she was hoping for another amazing kiss.

“No, I’ll be fine. You should go.” She didn’t understand the complete change of heart. He could see tears forming in her eyes.

“Look, I just want you have this great moment of me. I want you to always think of me when you go the beach. So please just go, and smile for me, okay?” He kissed her on the cheek. She let him walk away until she could barely see him anymore. She didn’t want to go back to the quiet house with low hours at works and bills piling up.

Sad, she kicked around the sand to find a wallet. She opened it to see his face on the ID. She ran toward the direction he had walked in, but no one was there. She looked at the address on his ID and decided to return his wallet.

It was just two streets away from the beach. She needed the walk.

The address matched a white sided house with a small wooden fence around the side. There were red, yellow, and pink rose bushes in front of the porch. She walked up the stairs, knocked on the door, and sighed. She was hoping he would be at the door to greet him with a great embrace.

An older woman answered the door, her eyes were just as blue as his, but her face had miles of stress over it.

“Hi, I wanted to give Jonathan back his wallet.” Jesse has so much hope and joy in her voice. She could see afternoon teas with Jonathan’s mother talking about how him as a child. She could see how their life together would be so great.

“I really don’t know how to tell you this. . .” Jesse’s day dreaming instantly stopped. Jesse didn’t speak, but she just watch the older woman’s bleak expression.

“Please come in.” She explained. Jesse was hesitant, but she wanted an answer. She followed the older lady.

“Please sit down. Would you like some tea?” Jesse smiled, sat down, but declined the tea.

“I’m sorry, but my son, Jonathan, is dead. Has been for twelve years today?” She noticed her cat calendar. Jesse was speechless, but his mother could see the endless questions in the young girl’s teal eyes.

“He was helping a young woman at the beach, and he hit his head in the water, trying to help her. It was an accident.” She poured herself some tea.

“Are you sure?” She offered again. Jesse wanted something stronger. Her eyes scanned the living room filled with pictures of the young man and his mother. There was on with him and a cat; it made her smile.

“I have been getting a different girl each year, and each one needs something.” The aged lady paused. . .

“What is it that you need, dear?”

“It’s was last year when I lost my cat. I miss him dearly.” She knew that bills will always be there and eventually she will get another job, she really missed her tuxedo cat whiskers. The older woman excused herself for a moment.

“Maybe that is why this kitty kept coming back to my porch?” She had a large black and white cat.

“Oh my God, this is Whiskers. I can’t believe you found him.” She was so excited that she hugged the old woman. She saw how lonely the old woman seemed. She gave the woman the wallet and agreed to visit. Jesse kept her word.

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This story was inspired by Jonathan Brandis RIP08fe4284836d722ed4b9a20de3ef5183 21d29ab636aee498483f3b3c3006e7f0 download Drawing-jonathan-brandis-20910659-605-875 images (8) jonathan the-life-and-tragic-death-of-neverending-story-2-star-jonathan-brandis-313613

14 Day Challenge Day 10 Write a Letter to your future self

14 day writing Challenge; Day 10 write a letter to my future self. . .

Dear Rebekah (In the Future)

First of all, I am sending you hope. (I know what it is like to lose it.)
I hope you are always fed.
I hope you also have cuddly cats that purr in your ear.
I hope you always have the bills paid.
I hope you stay close to your family.
I hope you enjoy the little things in life. (Enjoy food and smell the roses.)
I hope you always laugh. (You and I know you can start to deal once you let yourself laugh.)
Most of all I hope you are happy; always be happy. Only you can control what makes you happy. (You can NOT control anyone else or make them happy.)

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Secondly, family is important.

Even if you argue, not feel good enough, or just want something different, your family will still love you. (Just remember shoes. . . you and I will both know what that means.)
Set aside your pride, if you need something, your family will be there.
If you can help someone, then help. . . remember what your parents taught you.
Remember sometimes just a text will make someone’s day.

Thirdly, if you have kid(s). . .

Let them learn and be who they need to be. (Please do not have plans for them, let them figure out who they are. Chances are they are going to be stubborn if you push.)
The word “No,” it okay to say. Your job is to keep them safe and healthy until they are old enough to do it themselves. . . then you are too invested.
A parent is an unseen hero: they do what they have to do regardless. Your kids will not appreciate this until they have kids.
However if you do not have kids, then find out what it is that fate wants you to do. Let fate decide, they are bigger than you.

Fourthly, you are meant for big things!

You are smart.
You are a good person.
You are generous.
You are helpful.
You can learn new things.
You are determined.
You will get things done.

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YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO.
YOU WILL FINISH YOUR WRITING PROJECTS.
YOU WILL GET MONEY FOR WORKING ON A BLOG.
IF YOU WANT IT DONE, THEN JUST DO IT!
You know you can.

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Sincerely

Your Old Self

PS My stepmom (the one with my name), that has really help me to get out and get a better outlook. Greatly appreciated.

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Who I am. . . the harsh truth.

The Harsh Truth

Getting through: For all those guys out there . . .

I am a bi-curious, white, hot blooded female. I enjoy the romantic company of men. I get along better with men. I can laugh with men. I can hang out with men. I try to hang out with women, but many of them have been very manipulative, dramatic, ( or controlling of their boyfriend/husbands.)  (Please note: I am not saying that all women are like this, because I know some of my online friends who are amazing. It’s just a few women that I know have been jealous and cranky. . . it turns me off.)

I’ve had my share if experiences: good and bad, and I have learned many things.

I am NOT worthless! (I am talented.)
I am NOT useless! (I am compatible of anything I want to.)
I am NOT weak! (I am a challenge.)
I am NOT a slave! (I am a leader.)
I am NOT a slut or whore! (I only enjoy sex with the one I love.)
I am NOT a bitch! (I am opinionated.) (Actually, I am bitch if you push me that way.)

I am a creatively boisterous person who enjoys helping others.
I am happy and honored when I can help others accomplish their dreams.
I am the type of person who always puts others in front of myself.
I am honest, and I have been known to be blunt.
I am straight forward, and I don’t like mixed messages or head games.

I will NOT be threaten!
I will NOT be anyone’s servant or slave!
I will NOT put up with anyone’s shit!
I will NOT be used.
I will NOT be abused.
I will NOT change myself for someone else.
I will NOT be second rate.

I can be a really loyal friend or your worst enemy.

I am a sweet person who deserves respect.
I am fair, or at least I try to be as fair as I can be.
I am friendly, and I can be flirt.
I am a nice person who wants everyone else wants. . . to be loved.

For once in my life, I am happy with who I am.
If you don’t like me, then I’m sorry about your lost!