Note: I will not mention names. . . they know who they are.
Part 1. A little about me. . .
I like to consider myself the invisible helper. . .
I look like my mom, I act and think like my dad, and I have my step-mom’s name. Rebekah Wolveire is a pen and Internet name. . . It’s not my real name, but I will not publicly post this name.
I have always liked to help people, and it makes me to happy to see other happy. However I some how believed that I find the wrong kind of people. Except for the guy I am currently with, I seem to those who take a mile, when I give an inch.
Part 2. My Childhood
Over all, I grew up with a somewhat normal childhood until age twelve. . .
My parents divorced when I was eight. . . then I had two Christmases. My dad got main custody of my brother and I and we saw my mom on the weekends. I was always the in between my mom and my dad. . . my mom and my brother when she couldn’t see him.
Eleven going onto twelve was a very crazy year. . . my ten year old brother had open heart surgery, I began a young woman, and my step mother had a son of her own. (She had another son when I was sixteen.) That next spring, I was going to school, helping my brothers, making dinner, doing dishes, and whatever else when my stepmother had to take care of her mother.
Part 3. Growing into a decent person
I grew up with always having a group of friends. . . I had that in junior high and high school. However even with my groups, I always was content in my own little world. I was always writing something ever since 5th grade. I remember when I first got my glasses and my reader teacher was so happy. . . She had me read all over the room. I write everything . . . poems, fan-fiction, my own short stories, and eventually scripts and now novels.
My junior high friends and I lost touch, because most of them continued to go to expensive Catholic high schools, and I went to the same public school where my mom and dad met. I don’t regret going to NRHS. I was in many accelerated classes . . . math and English. However most of my math teachers just made the subject so boring that I rather sleep than learn something. I manage to graduate with honors. I was very out going . . . I was in choir, drama, and secretary of the Spanish club. I also had private vocal lessons for around 14 years and won many blue ribbons for solo and ensemble contests (only to get ruined by a bitter college professor, but that is a story all of it’s own.)
From Junior high it was a straight shot that I was going to college. . . I don’t think I ever had any other options. Growing up, I felt I was on a track and the destination was college, because it was what was best. (It took me 6 years to get a two degree. . . I’m going too fast.)
From the day I was born, until I was seventeen, I was raised Catholic. . . You read the missilette, and you reflect on what the Priest had said, you paid your tithes, you confess your sins and say “Hail Mary,” and “Our Father” whatever many times they tell you. I will tell you it is not always the same same number for the same sin. And you just believe what you were doing what was good enough to get in heaven. . . as long as you didn’t break the ten commandments. . . and it doesn’t matter how many times you swear as long as confess and repent, you’re okay. However if you know it’s a sin, then why are you doing it? Or at least explain that you struggle being tempted. And I am not going to tell how the people were getting out of the church, I am surprised no one got ran over.
However I learned is that the Catholic church, didn’t help my family, because we were giving enough money.
From age seventeen until twenty-two, my family changed churches and we were Pentecostal. This is very opposite of the Catholic church . . . Catholic are about being properly dressed like you are going to a business meeting meets funeral. . . it’s was like you had to pay respects to God as if he was a CEO and you feared you were going to get fired. Pentecostal is much different you can wear your Sunday best or just wear a nice pair of jeans and nice shirt. . . they accept you either way. They actually read out of the Bible. . . What I loved the most is the worship: they play electric guitars, pianos, drums, and the music sounded like what was on the radio. Money was never an issue and people would hang out after the church and talk. There was no one worried about getting hit leaving the church.
My dad and I eventually took classes they had through the church and this is when I found about the politics of how the church worked. . . I saw people who needed help, and how they denied the help because they were worried about others thought, especially their family. I saw how certain families have power in church. . . and if they like you then your ideas happen. . . if they don’t like you, you may not even get phone calls in.
Part 4 Independence
When I was almost twenty-two, I moved into my mom’s from my dad. I felt it was a message from God. . . my mom needed more help than my dad, and I still believe that my grandma needed the help. Anyway, I moved in and helped out and I learned things about that side of the family and myself. I have learned that I really think like my dad, and that they can be stubborn, but are always there for each other even when they are argue with each other.
I’ve more of the world that way, instead of being stuck in a fishbowl. . . my virginity was stolen from me (but that is a story all on it’s own. I will tell it with one of the other challenges.)
I found my current boyfriend in 2007. He’s great. . . very supportive and makes me laugh. It’s weird, but needles from the hospital don’t hurt when he is with me. He has had dealt a lot with me. . . after I got mono and had a four day fever, my body has not been the same. I think I have hormonal and kidney issues and clinical depression, but he still stays with me.
I have learned more in the ten years of being on my own than I did in school. . . .
I have learned you don’t have to go to church in order to be spiritual.
I have learned you have to have a bad apples AKA boyfriends before you know what you want.
I have learned that I am easily distracted. I stay focused when I am competing.
I have learned that everyone has their own spiritual path. . . you can choose to listen to others or seek things out yourself.
I have learned that not everything has to be shared, but you make more friends when you do.
I have learned it is easier cooking for two non-picky people than 5 people with a picky person.
I have learned the older I am, the harder it has been to make and keep friends.
It's my Own World but it's OK. . . 